The Affect of Divorce
On Adult Children/ Adults (adult's children) / Society and Institutions
* AFFECT : 【 Psychology 】 A feeling or emotion as distinguished from cognition, thought, or action; A strong feeling having active consequences. 【心理学】情感，感情。
I do not know so much about the affect of divorce on adults but some friends of mine have their experience of parents' divorce and they once purred their hearts out to me. The reality to Qian (one of them) is almost the same to others. Her parents had been growing apart for years. Everyday when she went back home, all she could find is the empty house. Sometimes her father or her mother went to their each parent's home and left her in this dark room, not only the darkness in the room, but also the darkness in her heart. The arguing was performed on frequently in front of her, which pours her the sharp pains in heart. Although her parents were very clear what the result will be, they kept the secret that they had divorced 3 years ago until she finished the entrance examination to university. The shadow of her parent's failing marriage had been brought to her relationship to her boyfriend. It also formed her standards in what ways that she will choose to deal with others. Sometimes she is very optimistic, but she will fall into silent without any reasons. It is even difficult for her common friends to fathom her feelings in her deep heart because most of time, she pretend to be another style of her which total different from her, (always an iron-willed person) so that she won't be hurt any more. I was lucky as I gained the trust of her and also of many good friends, so that I can discovery something that was buried in her heart deeply.
We can often find that another same type of crime happen just few days of the first one in certain area. People imitate what they learned from the people around them consciously or unconsciously. So I think the growing rates of divorce also is caused by the human being' basic ability ―― imitation. We heard the divorce news from media world, from companions, from friends and also from our relatives. Maybe ‘a vicious circle' is not a suitable phrase to describe the reality, but in recent years the rates never stop growing. Especially in the U.S. , the divorce rates had been around 50%. It will cause people to think over the basic relationship among the human beings and course further desmic (concatenated) social problems.
Jackie Yuan
ID:01121123
Last Update: 01/19/2004 0:02